What To Do When You're Spiraling About the State of the World
The leadership of the United States is changing hands.
L.A. is on fire.
Palestine is under seige.
The planet is getting hotter and hotter.
Being a human is really hard.
And everyone I know is asking:
"What are we going to do?"
"What are we going to do?"
"What are we going to do?!"
I don't know.
We don't know.
It's okay to not know.
Say it with me now:
"It's okay to not know."
But what I can tell you (and me) with absolute confidence
is what will NOT help us to know.
We will NOT know what to "do" any faster
by allowing current events
to completely highjack our nervous systems.
We will NOT know
by listening to every 60-second Tik Tok perspective
in rapid succession
that exactly mirrors our own
We will NOT know by retreating to our echo chambers
online
in our homes
blue light
shining into our eyes and brains
for hours at a time
We will NOT know by listening to more news
or more news commentary
We will NOT know by trying to guess
at everyone's political affiliation in the grocery store
We will NOT know by assuming
one flag, one t-shirt, one bumper sticker
tell us everything we need to know about a complete stranger
We will NOT know what to do
by doom scrolling on Instagram
picking fights with our 3rd grade classmate on Facebook
or spending every waking moment fear-forecasting about
what might happen
what could happen
and the worst case scenario
We just don't know.
It's really uncomfortable to not know.
And it's okay that we don't.
Big changes in our world are going to influence and affect our nervous systems
they must
that's what the nervous system does
it helps us bend and flex to an ever-changing world
instead of just bend and break
Big changes can take our (more frequently) regulated state, called "ventral"
and send it skyrocketing into a fight-or-flight response, called "sympathetic"
that feels necessary
and mobilizing
and galvanizing
and important
(think reading a news alert to better understand some breaking news)
But the problem is that instead of getting some info and stepping away
We keep digging.
We hyper-focus.
We over-expose.
And no one can sustain that level of sympathetic nervous system engagement—
and more isn't better
more scrolling
fear-forecasting
talking
listening
scrolling
worrying
anxiety
worrying
thinking
over-thinking
scrolling
--and so, inevitably, like every other human on the planet for all of human kind
if we don't find creative ways to recalibrate back to ventral (regulated)
we lapse into something called "dorsal" shutdown
burn-out
overwhelm
collapse
depression
immobilization
numbness
dissociation
donezo
At this point, all of our efforts to be
"informed"
and
"engaged"
and
"ready to fight"
and
"march in the streets"
are completely useless
because we've spent to so much time in sympathetic activation
that when it comes time to actually do something (other than think-think, worry-worry)
we have nothing left
we are empty
Sympathetic nervous system activation is meant to be a place that we visit
Not a place where we live.
Let me be clear:
if you think your constant engagement with the topic of _____ is serving your mental health
you're wrong
it's not
Your neurobiology will win every time.
And you are actually making yourself less effective and less helpful
to the causes you say you care so deeply about
if you don't find ways to get your nervous system back to a ventral/regulated place.
So, I can't answer, "What are we going to do?" on a global level, for everyone
but I can tell you what I am going to do to help
regulate
soothe
restore
and respect my nervous system.
I'm going to continue deleting Instagram once a week
(engage on Sundays, delete on Mondays)
I'm going to continue not reading/consuming the news
(I promise you: the most important highlights still find me)
I'm going to continue playing pickleball
I'm going to pet my dog
I'm going to take a walk
I'm going to savor and enjoy my coffee
I'm going to eat my veggies, even when I don't feel like it
I'm going to stay hydrated
I'm going to use my five senses to engage tangibly and somatically with the world
I'm going to read fictional books and stories about wonder and whimsy and play
I'm going to get 9 hours of sleep, when I can
I'm going to titrate my exposure to relationships that tend to yank me into a sympathetic state
I'm going to lean heavily into relationships that help me feel regulated (ventral) and calm
I'm going to find creative ways that I might engage with my immediate neighborhood and community, because as Dr. Brene Brown says, "People are harder to hate up close. Move in."
In short, I am going to get through this and figure out--slowly, day-by-day--what to do next by:
being clear-eyed about exactly what is happening in the world
while also being stubbornly intentional about my own wellbeing
clear-eyed
and stubbornly-well
Slow your roll.
Stop the spiral.
Get back in your body.
We will keep figuring this out one day at a time.
